THIS. This so many times over! 7 Things You Might Think Are Consent That Aren’t is the most important read of your week. Take the time to read it as many of these things often go overlooked.
The concept of affirmative consent dictates that “yes means yes,” and that only an enthusiastic “yes” constitutes sexual consent. But what is not consent? A lot of the things we’ve been taught indicate sexual consent are actually not adequate ways of determining if your partner is into it or not. In order to make sure a sexual encounter is OK with both partners, consent needs to be vocal, enthusiastic, and continuous.
Just teaching people, especially young people, what is and isn’t consent can have a huge impact on their behavior. For example, in a survey published in Violence and Gender, 32 percent of college men said that if “nobody would ever know and there wouldn’t be any consequences,” they would have “intentions to force a woman to sexual intercourse.” (Terrifying, I know.) But fewer — 13.6 percent — said they would have “any intentions to rape a woman.” (Yes, still terrifying.) Just calling it rape deters people from doing it, so the better people can recognize assault, the fewer sexual assaults are likely to occur.
You’re not looking for a “no.” A “maybe” isn’t going to cut it. You’re looking for a resounding “yes.”
Please read the rest of the article on Bustle and start having a conversation with your close friends about what “consent” really sounds like.
Interested in learning more? Here’s a great video that draws a super charming parallel between consent and making someone a cup of tea.